Bringing it back to life!

Monday was shitty day. Didn’t sleep so much during the night. When I woke up I can say that my head didn’t work at all! And I mean it! If someone was talking to me, it took me ages to absorb it! It was a horrible feeling. Yesterday was a little bit better, but not at the top. Today has been a lot better day! Thank god!  

 Got so much I want to do before my trip, and it feels like there will not be enough days to do everything. Well, I might just starting to realize that we are actually leaving soon.  

 11 days, and counting……

Alicia is finishing up her last school work for this school year. Just a few things left to do. Yesterday she finished up science and reading. We are now also waiting for answers from Calvert, about high school. 

   
Today I did something big! I have decided to open up my old school, Haven Academy again! Yepp, you read right! Can’t tell you more than that right now. But it will be something new and I’m really looking forward to start working more it when I’m back from my holiday!  

 So with that, I’m wishing you all a great night!

//

Maria

Hate September!

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Today is the last day in the month of August. Tomorrow, it’s September and my most hated months of the year. Why? Everything that happened in September 2013, makes me wish that this month has one day and then it is over.

Over the past weeks there have been a couple of long nights with no sleep or very little sleep. The closer D-day we coming the worse it seems to become. Last year we were thankfully busy making sure that our house would be ready for us to move in again. This year it’s just our everyday life rolling on. And thoughts.

Now  some of you is wondering what happened in September 2013. I wrote a guest blog post on David’s blog a few days after D-Day. It tells a little bit of what happened those days in September. (Click here if you want to read David’s blog, Ungmorfar.)

Hello everybody,

Today it is not David who writes instead it is his wife, Maria. Since David’s last post, a lot has happened and I will do my best to tell you. Unfortunately I do not have the same talent as David to write, but will do my best.

Sunday, September 8th we all wake to a regular quiet Sunday. David was a little hangover after his  usual pool comp Saturday night, with an honorable second place against Pom. Amanda and David had entered a pact to start walking again and they decided to take a walk before Jacks nap. Even Alicia followed. I fixed for the coming school week and Andrea were preparing to go to work.

After the walk David lay down and watch TV and just dull. Jack wakes up and Amanda takes Jack and Alicia on a trip to the beach. After a while, tired of watching TV David goes up and lays down in the bed with some music and a bit of card game on the phone. I get up and lay me down next to him, and we talk a little about everything. In the middle of a sentence David becomes completely numb. Afterwards, I know he went into cardiac arrest. But there was total chaos. Managed to call for Amanda, Roh and Brett. Upcoming hour and a half, was the worst hours of my life. David will never be at my side again. He will never make us laugh. There and then changed my and our children’s lives forever. Thankfully Mr. Stefan came that evening.

We took David to the temple on Monday. We had time to talk to him, say goodbye and make sure he came to rest.

Wednesday, 11 September, David was cremated in the temple with good friends around him. Later in the day we brought home David. He is now at home with us and we have been waiting for friends and family to have the time to come before we put David to his final rest in the sea on Wednesday.

My mother, David’s favorite mother-in-law, landed already on the 12th, on Tuesday Uncle Sam landed, Friday morning my dad and Monika came, last Saturday we picked up David’s dad with dog, yesterday came David’s older brother Robert and good friend Björn, today we are waiting for David’s younger sister with her husband and children, and on Wednesday there will be another good friend, Mr. Perre and Miss Isabelle coming.

I want to thank all of you who read David’s blog. You made him happy every time you read.

Thanks to all the wonderful friends we have around us from far and wide! Your warm greetings is warming to get, and to know that I am not alone.

I can never by any words, thank those who have been by our side since the first moment. Want anyway send them thank you for being there, Stefan, Brett, Francesco, Jenny, Valentina, Party, Alek, Nick, Lina, James Roh and Bang Dedt !!!

Never forget to tell those close to you that you love them, you may never get the chance to say it again!

❤️ Love you Amanda, Andrea, Alicia and Jack! ❤️

Hugs to you all! // Maria

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My husband passed away in my arms. My children saw their father lifeless. How do you remove that image from the retina? Doesn’t work. It sits there forever. Maybe it will be weaker, but it will never disappear. The days in the temple we had the opportunity to “talk” with David. Mentally talk. It was something we all felt was right in a strange way. We had time to say goodbye and say everything we wanted to say. After that David came “home” to us. Also a strange feeling. But we could not do more, we needed to wait for our families and friends, from the other side of the earth to come. We waited for everyone who wanted to come to us and we had a nice ceremony on the beach along with a monk. Drove out with a jetski on the most craziest waves ever existed. Said a last goodbye before David came to his final rest in the ocean. Now everyone who wants to say hello to David, get out to the coast and dip your toes in the ocean and say “Hello”.

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All this took place during the same month, extended over the entire month. David’s birthday is in September to, with more memories that will run through us.

Can’t say that I want to remember those days, I don’t want to be reminded of those days, just want to live today. Doing everything I can to have a “normal” day, but all the terrible memories that rushes through the whole body, makes it pretty hard. Just want a day with lovely memories of the wonderful husband David was.

With this post, I just want to say that September is a month with a thousand memories, memories that I do not want to remember. I miss David every day. Every day I open my eyes I miss him. But I live, David’s daughters lives, David’s grandchild lives. We must continue to live. If I seems cold and not show my regret at those terrible days in this month, it’s not that I do not miss David. It is because I do not want remember all the terrible things that happened. I want to live with all the lovely, crazy moments we had together. I want to wake up and feel that it is a good day, a good day to take new steps toward an uncertain future, but without my David.

As I so often emphasized in the past for everyone who read, do not forget to tell your loved ones you love them. You never know where tomorrow wears off and it may be too late.

Amanda, Andrea, Alicia, Jack, mom, dad, Monica and Mike, love you all to the bits and are so glad you are mine! Live life, my friends!

// Maria

P.S.

To all of you who really likes to know everything and listening to all the talk, I would just say; I live, and live  under the circumstances a good life. I stand on my two feet every day and do the things I want to do. Do you want to something about us? Come and ask!

D.S.

Heavy breathing 

It all started Thursday with Amanda come and says she has trouble breathing normally. Later that day I read in the news that we got haze over the island from the fires in Indonesia. And has been heavy to take a breath sometimes. It’s been a lot easier today, thank god! 

 Alicia finished up her essay needed to write for her enrollment to High School. She’s such a trooper! Some hard work this week and she will be finish with grade 8 too. Then we are just waiting for the test she’s gonna need to do for High School. Then she is going for a few weeks of holiday! 

Now is two weeks left, then Alicia and I will be on a plane on our way to New York!! We want to go now!! All our clothes is washed up ready to be packed in our bag. Planning for what we gonna do in New York and Chicago is done. So we are ready to go!

Today I also sent in my first set of test for a Unit A in Hair Styling. Now I’m just gonna wait for my grade. Checked out what’s up in Unit B. Holy shit! Curling hair in different ways and a little bit more. No rest here!

It’s been a pretty nice weekend. Except that I got really pissed off yesterday! Can’t tell you why, but I was boiling! Grrr …. People!!  

   
Thursday night we took our sweet friends, Pii Four and Pii Gop out on dinner. Jack and Gop had their own little private time. Those two are so fun to watch. 

Bye!

//

Maria

Say no to drugs!

I’ve been living with drugs close by and I’ve seen what it can do to you as a person. I can say I’m not a big fan of it. Staying as far away I can from it. Today there is s new project starting in our village. Stop all drugs! It’s been going on for a while, but today we had Phukets vice governor cutting the band for it to official. I got invited to join the ceremony.  

    
    
   
Yesterday I got some company during yoga with two friends. Can say that my kitchen doesn’t look so big with all of us doing yoga! But we had a lot of fun! 

 Now I’m gonna call the states and talk with Alicia’s school so she can get enrolled to High School when we are coming back from our trip. 

//

Maria

So tired

It’s been a few hectic days here. Website, studies, yoga, new business idea and not sleeping. Not the best combination at all. 

Website for Dilla Group is up but more stuff is coming up. Yoga with Cath has been good, as always.  

 She is still trying to bend me like crazy. But I like it a lot! Or more, I need it a lot! I’m sitting on my butt way to much.

Got my school books for Hair stylist course so I started that one this week. It has 5 units that I need to finish before I’m done.  

 Sent in my second unit in Fashion Stylist earlier this week. Got my grades back, A+! Got graded from Nathan Johnson himself!! This course has 8 units to finish, 6 more is coming.

My Makeup Artist course had 6 units to finish up and I got 2 done so far. Now you probably wondering why I’m doing all three of them at the same time. I need to practice what I’m learning, need to search a lot and I need to do a business part in all three subjects as well. So mixing them all up makes it a little bit more fun. Been think of signing up for Makeup Effects and Airbrush too. But that will be after our trip. 

    
 Alicia and I got ourselves down to the beach for a walk Tuesday morning. It was a beautiful morning down there. Got some company of a monkey too!! Have never happened before. 

Had some meetings this week about my new idea, and I only got positive reaction on it. Decided that I’m going to do it! Now it’s all in! Will tell you more when things starting happen. (Don’t want anybody else to steel my super great idea!!)

Then last night the shit hit me! Couldn’t sleep! Grrr….. Today has been a slow day. So I’m soon off to bed and hoping that it will be a great night of sleep.

Good night!

//

Maria

Do I have to read more?

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Do you know one thing? I don’t want to open up a newspaper anymore!

So far, I have personally been spared of all the terrible things happening around us every day. For a long time I’ve been thinking about when that call will come? That call that says that someone close has been killed. Because of what?

First it’s a young girl, on her way home from her summer job, who didn’t come home. Then there’s a young girl who didn’t come home from her jog in the forest. The second is the two people who lost their lives because they had decided to stop and do some shopping at IKEA. IKEA! Then you can’t go out as usual on the street without having to look over your shoulder, because you don’t want to get stabbed in the back by someone you don’t know who pass you. This is just a small selection of all that is happening around us daily.

Now I do not live just where all this happens, but my family, relatives and friends do. I live far away and do not have to feel uneasy when my kids go outside of the door. Even so, I feel uneasy. That there may be someone I know next time.

Yesterday all this uneasiness suddenly come even closer to me. On a street, that I and the girls have walked on many times, bang. In the middle of Bangkok. A bomb. Planned or not? Nobody knows. Why? No one can answer that.

What happened to all those wonderful days that I remember from my childhood? When I felt safe wherever I were or did. This is the world that we now starting to hand over to our children, or grandchildren.

There’s something I’d like to do. I would like to make a day, or two, in which we all should just be nice and kind to each other. Say hello to each other on the street. Smile at each other. Help each other. Worldwide. Show everyone this beautiful world we live in and that we can live in harmony with each other. And don’t be afraid of the person you meet on the street. Who is with me?

//

Maria

Excited!!!

My books are here!!! 

 No more turning back! This gonna be so fun! First we’re gonna have us a day off! Going for some shopping tomorrow with my girls! 

This week has been tuff. One night with no sleep, keeps the day after in a heavy mood. Still got a lot of things done, so I’m happy about that. Will probably be working this weekend instead. 

Also got my second package too. From Beautylish. I’ve order some makeup that I can find here in Thailand. When I open it, I got a really pleasant surprise! A small card, hand written and personally addressed to me! So sweet!! And all of my products was neatly packed. 

    
   
Ended an excited day with a dinner with my sweet old friend, Jim. Hamburger and business talk when it is the best! Jim is usually the one that give me some really good inputs on all my crazy ideas. Can tell you a secret. He liked my new idea!! So now its time to rock ‘n roll!

Sleep tight everyone! 

//

Maria